Times are Tough

Mind is the true ruler. The ruler of the body. Whichever great man said that was correct to every word. But sometimes, when the body fails to respond, the brain takes a back seat. Hence, this write-up.

This passing week was a test of patience for me, a god’s test to see what I do in such situations. I got fever. People who know me even half can tell me it is nothing new. I have had more paracetamols than mangoes, visited a doctor more than my relatives and used a thermometer more frequently than a pen. Thanks to my superb memory, a majority the only few remaining memories of my childhood are of sitting in a doctor’s waiting room, with a worried look on my parent’s face (as if I have shown them my report card), and a pathetic look on people looking at me.

I got a paracetamol from my roommate who was ill a day earlier. To my worst surprise, as if to intensify my pleasure in being sick, these words were etched on the tablet: “welcome”. What could you possibly deduce from such a phrase? It’s like ‘please have a seat’ written on the electrocution chair of a prison!

Now from the third day into the heated feverish days, I have a sore throat. Previous glorious experiences remind me of laryngitis. For those fortunately not acquainted with the horrific term, asking what in Madhu Koda’s name is this, it is an illness causing you an amplified sore throat and making your voice less of an audio signal and more of a noise signal. On top of it, it has added benefits.

So I was having a voice like the masked version of batman (when considering clarity), only n times worse. Last time I had the honor of having this disease, I fearfully recall, I used to sit near my laptop with notepad running, and font size 72 selected. The doctor had suggested total voice rest, and I wasn’t able to speak as it is, if I thought otherwise. This had lead to many misunderstandings when I tried to communicate with anyone sans words, further leading to epic frustration.

This coughing problem suddenly increases during the night, for reasons unknown. Thus, I spent (and am spending) sleepless nights, as no one can sleep coughing every 15 seconds. This incessant coughing has brought up another problem of stomach ache. Sleepless nights mean sleepy days. Sleeping during the day causes more sleepless nights.

As I was finding a way out of this vicious cycle, god, idling away his time, again bumped into me. Once again for his entertainment and much to my rebel, he gave me conjunctivitis. The most frustrating disease ever. Swollen, heated, irritated, blood red, dirty, itchy, reduced vision eyes.

Now, I was having fever, suffering from laryngitis and having conjunctivitis. It was like meningitis, elephantiasis, paralysis and hepatitis were on their way. It was in times like this that I revisited the status of god’s existence. More on that later. And in times like this I found out three ways to cure someone from any disease. First, tried and tested: visit a doctor (people staying in KiiT will realize that this option is invalid for them). Second: use your will power to think that you are well and ultimately get well (people with logically capable brains will realize the crap value of this). Third, the best way, is to not pay attention to the disease and act as you would have without it. No, I haven’t gone berserk with all the diseases ramming my body simultaneously, interfering with the rare normal functioning of my pea sized brain.

And who in ‘kaaladhan’s’ name said that: ‘when going gets tough, the tough gets going’. Anything that sounds beautiful isn’t true.  If tough got going, it means that going never got tough.

Really, times are tough!